Hate this

Oh Adrian,

I am so sorry you feel so low at the moment. Hang on in there, perhaps after the jungle juice you might feel brighter. I really wish someone could help you with the stomach problem.

Do we know whether this is part of the end stage leukaemia, or is it the stomach bug you can't shake off because you are so poorly.

Try to stay strong Adrian, I know it is all very well for me to say that, when I have absolutely no idea how you feel. Try to take comfort from what you have achieved, and that thousands of us are wishing that you could feel better.

My love as always Adrian.

Bless you

Ree

Sorry it is a bit rough.

Just remember many people are thinking of you and rooting for you.

My prayers are with you

Phyllis

Adrian,

So sorry to hear you are feeling really sick. I wish there was something I could do for you when you have done so much for raising awareness. You deserve to be able to rest easy knowing what amazing things you have done, the fact that you are in so much pain and discomfort is just plain cruel. Have a word with your docs and get as much pain relief as you can.

You will never be forgotten. You are a truly special man.

Love Em x

Hi Adrian,

I hope that your hospital visit today gives you the 'pep' you need to improve your quality of life.

Everyone reading your blog is totally inspired by you. I have never met anyone like you with your determination and will to achieve your goal. It is amazing!

Thinking of you all all your wonderful family,

God Bless,
Jenny & Family

I'm a new reader from the US. I work in the media and would like to share your story with my viewers. Remember Adrian you never know whose life you're inspiring or when you're doing it. God bless you and hang in there. I'll be thinking of you.

Sorry you're feeling so very rough Adrian.

I'd do anything to take that feeling from you - as would ALL who know and love you.

It feels trite to say that I'm thinking of you and sending you love - but I assure you that I am - in buckets full.

Yvette

xxxx

I don't know what to say. I honestly wish I could lend you some of my strength through the internet.

I know that this is small consolation, but you have inspired me to take more chances and pursue my own course of happiness instead of settling for someone else's vision.

I know this sounds corny, but you are my hero.

In return, I want you to hang on. Please don't stop fighting, Adrian. I know what the doctors say, but nothing is impossible. Impossible is just a word people use for something that hasn't happened yet.

And when you feel like you can't go on, know that some middle-aged Jabroney from America's life has been irrevokably altered because of your generosity of spirit, and he is stubbornly trying to return the favor through strength of will.

I'm pulling for you, Adrian.

Hi Adrian
My father in law recently died from brain and lung cancer, he didnt know about any of it until he was rolled into hospital feeling like he had a stroke. 5 days later he died suddenly after suffering a massive brain bleed. He was scared, it was tough, but most importantly he never had time to say goodbye, or to tie up any loose ends. I cannot for one moment understand what you are going through, but as most of us do, I understand pain and loss. It sucks that this has been your burden and has happened to you, but try to focus on the blessings. You can tell everyone you have touched how much they mean to you. You can say goodbye and leave with an inner peace that most of us wont ascertain when we go. Be strong, the body can suffer, its only an engine and engines break down, I am an atheist - but I do know a bit about physics - and energy cannot be destroyed.....it merely changes form.
Thinking of you
Steve

Adrian, so sorry you're so unwell.

I'm sending out warm thoughts and all the positive energy I can possibly muster up! I so wish I could do something to help. You're so special. We're all rooting for you.

I've gained a great deal of understanding of your condition in a very short space of time thanks to your efforts. I was wondering though, if they can give you red cells to raise your haemoglobin and platelets to help with the blood's clotting, why can they not give you a top up of white cells to help fight off this infection? I guess it's far more complicated than that. (would the white cells attack your body, as in GvHD?)

Anyway, I've said this before, I'm not normally particularly religious but I'm praying for you .

If your condition could improve on the strength of people loving you and willing you on alone, you'd have been cured by now! I hope you feel considerably better after your hospital visit today.

All my love, Charlotte xx

All I feel for you today is "why?" and it's YOU that is suffering not me! I can't ever imagine what all this must feel like and it makes me feel tearful that all YOU'VE achieved is ultimately going to be what WE will continue to see, but not you! Right now I wish I could put you in a cocoon and heal you! Grrrr!

Hi Adrian,
I spent ages trying to think of the "right" thing to say but realised that if you were my son i'd just give you a big cuddle as they speak a thousand words.
Hope you feel better after the bloods. Thinking of you
Sarah B xx

Oh Adrian, I am so sorry to hear you are feeling low and I can fully understand why.
I can only hope bloods and rest will pick you up enough to improve your quality of life.
I'm thinking of you at this difficult time.

Sorry to hear you are feeling so ill today. Your schedule this week would have floored a fit elephant - so no wonder you are exhausted, ill and flat. Lets hope that the treatment helps.

Cruel to ask yet more of you - but stay strong - your amazing family need some time with you.

Sending you so very much love, energy and good wishes.

Elaine A
xxx

I know there is nothing I can say to ease your pain right now.

Just want you to know I'm thinking of you.

Love from across the ocean.

Adrian, you are always in my thoughts, i will keep praying hard for you, you are inspiring us all. xxxxxxx

Hi Adrian

I was so disappointed and upset when i read this morning's post..after such a great day, to feel like this...there must be something that can be done...what would happen if you had another bone marrow transplant now?

I hate to hear you feeling so low...life is being so cruel...all I can think is that at some point your fortune has to change...

thinking of you
dont give up! xx

Hope the blood helps. Keeping you in my thoughts.
India

Dear Adrian,

May be no words can comfort you, feeling so sad hearing that you are not feeling well.

I do not know what to write, please dont think negatively.Sitting here in a far away country I feel that you are someone very close to me, and it makes me sad to hear you speak like this.Medicine has a long way to go.I beleive doctors there will do whatever they can to help a man like YOU!They have limitations, we have to accept that.

I dont have any serious health problems, but I have other problems, may be all of us have.Hope against hope..that is my nature and that is what keeps me going.I wish I can give you my life.

To be frank I do not want to talk about death,but if that is what is waiting for you...fight and fight, dont just succumb.And die peacefully thinking that you did everything from your part to survive, that you did your best...It is unfair for a young unique person to die at a very young age.

I read about your dream of having a family, I too had a dream of having a family ,I am years elder to you, till now no family...never married..dont even know what a man -woman relation is!! This I just wrote to let you know that somethings in our lives are preplanned - by whom I am not sure,I am alive and healthy but that doesnt mean I can have everything .May be I have more time..dont know and not going to think too much about future.

I hope somebody can do something to reduce your pain.Pain is something that makes us feel miserable,that is when we think death is better.I hope doctors will surely do something to reduce your pain.

Adrian, please dont admit defeat easily, keep fighting.

Lots of love and prayers.

Shiney

Adrian I am so sorry to hear how poorly you are still feeling this morning. I know that nothing I say will make you feel any better so all I can do is send you lots of special love and hope that your day in hospital will do you lots of good. I think about you lots each day and hope tomorrow will bring more positive news. You are a truly amazing man and your family must be so proud of you. I am!
Keep strong.
Jane (Slaithwaite, Huddersfield)
xxxx

Dear Adrian,
After working so hard towards the petition, it's no wonder that having handed it in it's like a great anticlimax - you don't have that immediate focus to take your mind off how lousy you've been feeling.

Just let the care bears at the hospital do their job in focussing on you for today and let everyone around you just look after you.

I know it must be so hard to keep your spirits up when you are struggling with this 'bug' but you have been so important to so many people - that's YOU not just the campaign - we are all sending up prayers (in my case) or 'positive vibes' or wanting the best for you.

Don't give up just yet Adrian, There are still so many high points to be had for you and while your family have you with them they can cherish you and that will be so important for them and to them in the future.

Hopefully, by the end of today you will be feeling if not a new person, then at least a lot better.

Thanks Liam too for keeping the blog going - if Adrian can't manage to keep it updated - it's really helpful to know what to focus our prayers/thoughts on for him and his family.

Love in spades to you all, Denise

I cannot say that I know what if feels like... But I know you shouldn't give up!
Try to keep yourself occupied and busy!
And don't forget that, at the end of the day, you don't only have your family to support you... You have us as well! :)

Panos
Greece

Adrian, I am so so sorry to hear that you are still poorly, this is really dragging on and it isn't fair on you - you have done so much for other people why can't anyone do anything for you.

Surely there must be some way that the doctors can ease your symptoms for you; I hope at the hospital that you can speak to someone and maybe get something to help.

It is awful to see you suffering like this Adrian and I know there is nothing we can say that will make things better, but we are all here thinking of you very often throughout the day.

Sending you bucketfuls of love,
Caroline x

Hi Adrian

Can't they give intravenous antibiotics for the stomach problem?

When Dan ill with infection in his line they did.
Or are they wrong kind of bugs?

You did so well yesterday and have to say looked so gorgeous in your suit! Felt so proud of you.

Now just feel frustrated can't make you feel better. If the power of thought could make you well, you would be better in an instance with all the well wishers that you have.

Thinking of you now as always

with love and hugs

Sally x

Thank you for sharing your life with us. You are an inspiration to live my life to the fullest. God has a plan for each one of us and if you know Jesus Christ, then you can be thankfully with him soon enjoying a fully restored body in heaven. In the mean time, it's good to see that you are making the most of this life here on Earth. Thanks for everything you're doing.

Reagan USA

Hope this day improves for you, its not bloody fair sending love and a hug pam.x

Hi Adrian,

Once again...

"There are pains of all kinds. Physical trauma, broken relationships, failed ventures, consequences of wrongs done - all are different and all the same. And each of us has to decide about quitting, playing to the pain, or working through"

This I got just now in my mailbox.I hope you select " working through"

As always I will pray for you.

Shiney

Hi Adrian

Honesty , brutal raw honesty, it not only reflects well on your journalist credentials, but mainly speaks to the character of ,you the man .

I propose a new term in modern lexicography
" Sudders " def: To tell it as it is .

Dan

Dearest Adrian

Reading today's entry upset me, because I don't want you to suffer. Only you know how you really feel inside. I think I understand where you're coming from...much as we all want you to fight we're not in your shoes...

Having said that, I sincerely hope your day in hospital will help you both physically and mentally.

As everyone says, we are all sending you positive vibes and more love than you know, although I think you do know, and my hope is that you'll feel able to cope better after today. Bless your heart...

I admire you for sharing both your good and your bad days. That's what we're here for, to support you whatever.

Maybe put your trust in others for a while and try to go with the flow. Sleep well tonight and will check on you tomorrow. Sending you a calming, soothing and healing hug.

Thinking of you all constantly

All my love
Barbara xx

Wish I could do something to help you personally - it all seems very unfair. I am going to hope and pray that you feel as better as you can.
You really are the most inspirational, gorgeous guy and I wanted to let you know that you are forever in my thoughts...

Dearest Adrian,
What a bummer!!!
So sorry you're still feeling so ill. You've made me cry again with your honesty. I had a flu like virus five weeks ago which left me with post viral fatigue. I was so weak I was frightened so I can't imagine how you have coped with the extent of your exhaustion.
Get all the help you can from the hospital visit today and then rest again.
BUT - whatever you do, DON'T GIVE UP. We need you as a friend and look forward to hearing happier news later today or tomorrow.
Love, hugs and soothing thoughts to you and yours.
Christine M. XXX

Hi Adrian,
You are going to have good days and bad days, just try and think that tomorrow will be a much better good day (esp after your new bloods).
Thinking of you and wishing you well xxxxxxxxxx

Hi mate. (Actually I hope you don't mind the 'mate', I feel I know you a bit from the blog and from my own experience of leukaemia)

I can't really say anything meaningful that will help. Being ill is bad enough, preparing to die must be really tough. Maybe a bit of vampire juice will help, also you might be feeling low physically and emotionally after such a huge day earlier in the week. I hope the weekend will bring a bit of respite for you.

I don't know if it would help or if you would want it, but there will be counsellors available to talk to either through your hospital or something like Macmillan. Sometimes talking to someone outside of friends or family can be helpful, you don't have to worry about upsetting or offending them,(I know as I am a counsellor for a bereavement charity). As I said, I don't know if it is your sort of thing, but it might help.

Hang in there buddy, and thanks for being so honest and sharing the bad times as well as the good times on the blog.

Best wishes
Allon

Hi Adrian

So sorry that you feel so unwell and down today. Hopefully a day in hospital may help. Be utterly selfish for a change and think of yourself.

Thinking of you.

Hugs
Christina

Adrian
Hope tomorrow will be a better day for you - keep that spirit up, I dont want to say all thats been said - just to say lots of love & care is on the way to you and yours!
Sue x

Dear Adrian,

So sorry to hear you are so poorly today,
hope for better news after your visit to
the hospital,
love and hugs,Jean xx

I'm really sorry to read you're feeling so bad and so blue.I know I cannot do much phisically, but i want you to know you're in my thoghts and in my prayers. love, Giorgia

Adrian

I can't bear that you're feeling so ill. It's not fair and you've every right to feel sorry for yourself. Please take comfort from the fact that everyone's thinking of you and rooting for you and we're so proud of you

lots of love
Katy

hi sweetness

a drain is the last place you are going to die, Adrian. you are walking out of your body with your head held metaphorically high, your dignity in-tact, your whole self cradled in all the love you have generated. being sick sucks but it doesn't change the fact that you are a rock star, a leader, a blessing to this earth.

i wish you calmness and peace, and an end to the stomach problems. if you can try to observe the pain and sickness it may invade you less and therefore have less impact on your energy.

much love
lorraine in algeria

Oh lovely, amazing Adrian

Look how totally helpless we all are, wanting so desperately to say something to make you feel better.

Perhaps that is all we have to offer and maybe that is the incredible lesson you are learning. That humanity, in the form of unknown strangers, can connect on a level of total love and concern and you, my dear man, are the focus of all of this.

I wouldn't dream to dismiss your pain and fear, I wouldn't attempt to offer you a way through this, but I believe we are all here for a reason and only when we have glimpses of that reason, do we catch glimpses of god. I can only hope and pray that in this terrible place that you find yourself, you will catch a glimpse of who you are and what you are achieving.

Because you ARE achieving amazing things. Not the things you or any of us might want for ourselves, but such is life. It gives us the lessons we need, whatever our own desire.

You are amazing. You are touching thousands if not millions of people and creating in each of us love and compassion that quite simply wasn't there till you came along into our lives.

Our love and hope and prayers for you are for you and you alone. They exist because of you. And they have a power bigger than all of us.

Like Sarah B above, I know I would just hug you if you were nearby now, but I can't. But my love that would be in that hug is just as real, here, in my heart and fingertips writing this, as if I COULD hug you.

We all love you in many ways Adrian. I hope you catch glimpses of that love through this tough, tough day.

God bless sweetie,

Kate & Co
XX xxx

Hi Adrian

Like everyone else I was so sorry to read this morning's post and wish there was something I could do to cheer you up - but you are right to tell it how it is. I'm not in the least surprised that you feel so ill and low today: (a) You've been keeping it together for everyone for the campaign (b) the stomach problem would be debilitating enough for anyone to deal with after this amount of time. Your body is just not able to get the nutrients it needs, and this certainly will have a knock-on effect on your morale. I am, however, certain that you will rally again.

Sending you all my love
Amanda

Dear Adrian,

Sending you a big cyber hug. Hope you feel better after the blood and platelets,

XX

Hi Adrian,

I came across this blog yesterday - I saw you in Look North the other day and it triggered memories of your story. I went to have a look and ended up reading your story from beginning to end.

You have been through some difficult and emotional times, and you have shown a lot of strength. Hang on to the love and warmth of your friends and family now.

I hope the fact that you have touched and changed many lives will help you build your strength over the coming weeks and months. You are a really special person and you will live on.

Keep shining, Sheffield Girl

Aw, Adrian, sorry things are so bad at the mo. In the last 18 months I have learned that cancer and chemo are bearable, it's all the other stuff that gets thrown at you that makes it so rough.

Everyone will be saying 'stay strong' but that can be damned difficult when you are in pain and discomfort. You don't have to be strong all the time. I'm the same as you, when things are bad, I want to be left alone.

Hope things improve today after the hospital appointment.

Jill x

Sorry you've been feeling so rough for so long, Adrian. Let's hope the blood and platelets will help to give you back some of that fight and, if not, be assured that you will continue to amaze us all with your courage. Please avoid all drains for the time being!

Lots of love,

Christina
Riddings, Derbyshire

Hello Adrian,

I'm so sorry that life is so rough for you today and I hope that this blog goes some way to allowing you to let out all the anger and misery that you are experiencing.

You know, everyone keeps telling you to fight and hang on but it's alright to let go too - if that's what you want.

I don't know what else to say, except I'm desperately sorry that you are suffering and, as always, you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Sending you love, good energies and peace.

Much love,

Julia xx

Please, please feel better today. A million wishes coming your way.
D x

I'm so sorry that you are feeling so rubbish at the moment.
I hope that the blood you get today makes you feel a bit better and that your stomach starts to sort its self out soon.

Love and best wishes

Clare

Oh hon

So sorry you are feeling like this. It must be so hard to keep yourself going when you feel so poorly. Just know that we're all here for you and sending you our love.

Angela

Hi Adrian

Sorry to hear that you are feeling so unwell.

Please take good care of yourself, and hope that the Hospital visit makes you feel better.

With all my love, and always in my thoughts !

Louise xxx

Hey Adrian
Sorry to hear you're feeling crappy pal. Nothing I can say really but I hope and pray that life gets easier for you soon, you deserve it. Always thinking of you

Hi adrian my name is jo.I just wontied to write to you,to how sad i feel that the bone morrow transplat has not work. iam sick of caner, and the people it takes. my son was diagnosed with leukaemia. and had to have a bonemorrow transplats, which work for him and its now 3 years may just gone.we where very lucky to get a donor.as there was just 1.that match.i l know myself what its like and how you feel.i am so lucky to have my son.andto not of lost him though cancer. i have seen iots loss there life though cancer.that i have got close to. its not fare.i am so sorry for what ur going though,i wish i could make you better.you should be proud of yourself.people need to open there eyes to the diease. and put there names forward too be come a bone morrow donor.its so importent.IT CAN SAVE LIFES.I seen alot not get a donor and have lots there life. i hope more people will come forward now. you have bought more awaeness.i hope ur feeling ok today. all my love jo.xxx

Hi Adrian

Being ill really sucks. Like you said, if it was just pain which is controllable then it wouldn't be so bad, but to be struck low with some sort of bug which drains the energy levels and generally leaves you feeling lethargic and miserable is just the worse. You're body is reacting naturally which means that you want to hide away from outside stimulus and withdraw into yourself. This is completely natural and it is what animals do when they are ill. Sometimes it is best to let nature take its course and get your head down and lie low for a few days. It may be nature's way of saying you need to be quiet and still to restore those flagging energy levels. Take one step at a time and maybe the bug will run its course and bugger off from whence it came. Sometimes fighting all the time is against nature. If you do choose to take a few days to recuperate just remember we are all rooting for you and thinking of you and your achievements all the time. You are never alone.
Chin up guy!
Polly xx

Hi Adrian,

Sometimes it's breathtaking to realise just how much you have to put up with. I am not surprised that occasionally it all gets too much and you want to retreat a bit. You had a long day going to and from Westminster and I'm sure that's zapped your energy. I hope that today's hospital visit will help you feel stronger.

I know that every single person reading your post today would, if they could, reach out and send you a healing hug to make you feel better. All we can do is send our thoughts, love and support to you through these pages and in our actions - continuing to support the campaign fully.

Adrian, don't berate yourself for any feelings of being sorry for yourself! My word, I'm sure that you're experiencing such a huge range of emotions and the darker moments are all part of that, and part of being human.

But the light and commitment you have given to your cause will shine forever, and that's something that I hope gives you strength and peace.

With very much love to the gorgeous Sudders.

Kate xxx

Sorry to hear you are having a pretty cr*p spell right now, I hope the bloods help you some today.

You are more than entitled to feeling fed up for a while, it's a tough time, you are amazing and inspirational but you are also human! It's allowed! ;o) Hang in there man, it's cliche I know but there are thousands of us rooting for you and hoping the fun can begin again soon. xx

Hey Adrian,

Sounds like a shit day. Sorry you're feeling so crappy, have you tried peppermint powder in warm water? That's good for stomachs. Thanks to the Crohns Disease I've tried just about every anti-nausea/ stomach pain remedy going, from the mildly successful to the downright disgusting but anything with peppermint in is usually good. Except peppermint tea which is exceptionally grim. Fortijuice is good stuff if you can get that, it keeps your strength up but without putting any strain on your stomach because it's liquid (mix it with fizzy water first though or it tastes like undiluted cordial). I know how truly miserable stomach problems can make you and at the time it feels like it'll never go and you'll never be able to eat normally again but it WILL go and you will feel better. Hopefully the platelets will give you a bit of a boost. And just think, it could be worse, at least you are feeling ill and miserable in an incredibly stylish designer dressing gown, you could be feeling ill and miserable in a pair of cut price grey Y-fronts and a string vest. Never forget - illness is no reason to let style slip!

Take care and I hope you feel better soon,
Love
Vicola

I'm so sorry to hear that you're not feeling too good today :( Ill be thinking about you today and over the weekend and hope to read that you are better on Monday. Take care xxx

Adrian, So sorry you are down. So many of us are pulling for you. You are such an important person and this is unfair for you to have to go through. Life is not always what we expect and often takes us by surprise. However, there is hope! I heard a sermon in church recently where the pastor said, "We all have a date with death-everyone." He went on to discuss salvation through Jesus Christ and how this ensures us of life eternal. Here is what the Bible says about heaven in Revelation 21:4-"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes;there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed again." This, my friend, is the where I want to live and I want you to be there too.
Much love to you Adrian, Leigh Ann
USA(Tennessee)

I'm not even going to try to say anything helpful because I can't. So all I can say is that I'm thinking of you and I'm hoping that somehow the doctors can get you feeling a little better so that you feel more relaxed and a bit happier. Sending you a massive (but gentle) hug too
Emma xxxx

Hi Adrian,

I'm not surprised you're feeling sorry for yourself. What you are going through and having to contemplate must be truly unbearable. You've been hanging on for so long and have achieved SO much that it's no wonder you're running on empty now.

Sometimes it really is ok to say enough is enough, to let go and see where you end up. I suspect you won't freefall too far before the legion of angels who surround you scoop you up and take the weight off for a wee while.

I'll keep any eye out and if I see you careering past me anytime soon I will do my best to catch you I promise - you are too special to drop.

Take care and big hugs
Kath x

that really sucks.

peace to you today.

Hi Adrian

not sure what to say really have been reading for a while and commented a few times but I don't really believe this is happening. It feels strange to feel something for someone you have not met and yet just by looking at the volumes of replies you are getting I am not the only one. Just rememeber when you have days like today remember the one you had yesterday was it worth the pay off. I think by the look on your photos it was. It will also be worth it for all those millions of people you have helped just by doing this. Be proud of yourself and rest today you never know tomorrow you may feel better and if you feel like you just can't go on then we will all have to accept your time has come and you have gone to a better place. Best of luck praying you feel better soon.

Henny

I can't be the only person who keeps coming back here to say something, only to find I don't have the words.

It's all just so fuXXing unfair!

Always on my mind...
x

Dear Adrian,

I was utterly devastated to read your post today and hear of how low you are feeling. Know that we are thinking of you and hoping against hope that you will feel better very soon.

The one thing I am sure of is that, come what may, a part of you will always live on in each of your many well-wishers worldwide. I just wish that, in return, each of us could donate a little life energy to you, to help keep you strong to face what lies ahead. Perhaps, in some small way, our messages of love and hope serve that purpose.

I have to thank you for being you, for doing all you have done and no doubt will continue to do. It is an honour to have come to know you through this blog. Your parents must be so very proud of you.

All the best for todays treatment, I hope it helps.

Best wishes.

A

Thinking of you and sending you love and hugs.

Elaine
xxx

After the whirl of the last few days I am not surprised you are feeling ropey. Hope the bloods perk you up today and you are able to get some decent rest. Never worry about sharing your despair via this blog, see it as a release mechanism and take some comfort from all the positive responses. Wishing you peace and calm sent with loads of love. Diane xx

I know it must be so frustrating to want to be active & continue your incredible bone marrow project but not have your body cooperate. I pray that today will be a day of rest & improvement & that they find something at the hospital to give you some relief. thinking of you often...

Hi Adrian,

Its about time you took time to feel sorry for yourself. No one could ever blame you for it. You have achieved so much in a relativly short space of time. Spend a bit of time now for yourself, feel shitty and upset but take comfort from all the people who love you and who will you to one. I've been reading your blog from the beginning and since then have been diagnosed with Coeliacs. You have taught me that its ok to feel crap but that I can still achieve things in life. I may never achieve anything as amazing as you have but I know for certain that you are a truely amazing and inspiration guy, not to mention the fact that you look so gorgeous in your suit. You are a wonderful person and real tribute to your parents, they must be so proud. Take care of yourself and I really hope your hospital day helps you feel a bit better. With all the love and hugs in the world Nicci xxx

Huge cyber hugs xxx

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you. Hope that everything goes well with the bloods today and that the doctors can do something to help with the stomach problem.

Love and best wishes

Just to let you know im thinking off you and hope you start to feel better soon.
A big kiss has been blown and is on its way!! :)
Well done on the petition. Its great news to hear how well you have done.
Lots of hugs and love
Charllotte xxx

Big hugs to you Adrian, ones that let you know we're here for you and supporting you in every way.
I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling so incredibly bad, and you are certainly entitled to have days where you feel sorry for yourself. The fact that you've had so few is testament to your incredible will.

Only you know when you've had enough Adrian. Just know we love you. I pray your docs can give you some relief and regain some comfort for you.

Thinking of you always...
Beth
usa

praying for you x

Hi Adrian.

The Headteacher of my school, North Hali Grammar, told us about you and the blog you have set-up. I would like to say on behalf of my form that you are being extremely brave and I will always remember you for being that.

Our thoughts will be with you.

God Bless,

Luke, NHGS.

I know you don't want anybody coming near you when you are feeling like this so here is a big fat virtual hug instead. Good luck with the bloods tomorrow

Thinking of you xxxx

Just found your blog recently, Adrian. I don't know what to say except that I am keeping you in my prayers. You are courageous and inspiring and I am sorry you are feeling so rough. God Bless.

J. Rogers (Saint Louis, USA)

Dearest Adrian,

I am so glad that you enjoyed your day in London what an incredible achievement you must feel so proud. Its a real bummer that you are feeling so rough now, Im sure once you have had a few bags of blood you will feel so much better, I recall a day last year when I was having chemo for my AML my HB was down to 7 and this didn't get detected until I fainted in the Day Unit, anyway they gave me 3 units of blood and the next day I felt like a new woman, I even managed to run up the road to meet my children that had come up for a visit I know this probably won't happen for you but lets hope it gives you a little more energy. I hope the stomach settles itself,

I know there were days when I just felt like giving up I really felt like my body could take no more and I just wanted to curl up and die. I did pull through thankfully, sorry for wittering on i wish i was good with words like you are. I know you will fight to the very end and never give up hope.

Thinking of you always.
Sarahxx

Adrian,

Thinking of you from across the pond.

Jan from Washington, DC

Adrian, bless your heart. I'm so sorry. It is unbearable to think of you suffering. You stopped treatment because you wanted things on your terms, and now you're miserable and you have no control over how you feel. It's everything you didn't want and everything you don't deserve. How could you not feel sorry for yourself?? You're still human. I am praying that you can find some comfort, somehow. Much love to you and your family.

Lacey

Hi Adrian,

I am sorry that you feel so sick. I hope that getting the blood will give you a little pick me up. I don't blame you for feeling sorry for yourself once in a while. Everything you have been through most people would have given up. You don't seem like most people. You are a very special person. Your parents must be very proud.
Hang in there.

Julie
USA

I can't tell you to hang on. I can't tell you to let go. All I can do is pray for you. I hope the pain eases and the illness takes a break so you have some peace. God bless you. -J

Sigh.
One does not want to waste your time with words and thoughts you do not want or need, so I wish I knew better what to say. You deserve a break from suffering, from being sick... from having to hang on, when life should be full and as easy as letting go. *Hanging on* is a demanding and sometimes unfair expectation that we make of people who are struggling the most. If there were some way that all of us could hang on for you, so that you can let go of pain and fear, needless suffering and discomfort, so that you can breath freely and heal... well if there were some way, that would be my gift to you.
I think about you often and marvel at the changes you have made, and I think you have made the world a better place. I am trying to understand and appreciate how difficult it must be to be an instrument of change: You have done great things, at a great price, and I would not be surprised if you long for normalcy... walk to work, read the paper, see a movie, sit in traffic, flirt. I know sometimes we envy the wealthy, famous, successful people, but a quiet, safe *normal* life must be enviable too.
Ha. Just thinking out-loud... I figure I am either sharing deep thoughts or being so profoundly boring and dense that I am an irritating distraction from feeling like sh*t.

What are your simple pleasures? What makes you happy, or would make you happy?

My heart goes out to you Adrain and your family and friends. I watched my own son die of Leukaemia five months post transplant aged 23 and even I can't find the words to help or heal all I can do is send love !!!!!!!

AD,
If only the love, warmth and well wishes which are shining through for you on this page could heal.. you would be whole..
If the lot given to us in life, were allocated on the impact we had made, the gifts that we had given to others and our inner light... again.. you would be healed in an instant..
You have done so, so much for others...I only hope you can truly understand the impact you have made, on the hearts and minds of both on myself and others.. it is a unique and beautiful gift, which you should be very, very proud of..
You once wrote in your blog.. "You are stuck with me, sorry about that".. well it works both ways.. and it is now our turn to be here for you and show you love and support.. and I am not one bit sorry to have come to know the amazing person that is you through your blogs and have been honoured to share your journey, in some small way.
Much love,
Laura
X

Remember you are effecting far more lives than you realize. Your impact on the community of those who need transplants will forever be in your debt. Those who you know personally will be inspired as well as their families and friends and those they share your stories with. Lastly there is a large contingent of people who may read the blog or hear of your story that are moved to make a change that could then lead to any number of effects in the lives of virtually anyone across the world. There are countless souls who keep updated to your situation that you will never recieve a post from and will never know they were even around. It is impossible to truly calculate or estimate the value or impact that you are having on this giant blue ball but I can testify that you probably will never know the true changes; the personal changes and impacts you've had on peoples lives. I know my children while across the pond from you know the importance of testing because I have been inspired to educate them. Hopefully that knowledge is passed to their children and friends and so forth. Congratulations on having a truly global impact the world is very proud and many are taking note.

I am truly sorry to hear you are feeling so unwell and are having to put up with so much crap. I think all the hard work you have done is such an inspiration to so many across the world! Keep fighting!

Melissa

Dear Adrian,

I hope by now you are feeling better.We all want you back.
You made a lot of difference to somany people around the whole world including me.
Please do let us know that you are getting better.
My sincere prayers and wishes

Shiney.

I can't say anything that hasn't already been said, just wanted to add myself to the list of people who are hoping for some increase in quality of life for you!
For lack of anything more helpful any of us feel we can do, sending these messages of hope helps us almost as much as they help you!
Directing all rays of sunshine your way...
Amy
xxxx

Thinking of you. Hope you're feeling a little better than this morning x

I'm sorry you feel so terrible. I can not imagine how you feel. I hope that knowing that so many of us, from all over the world, think of you every day ( I check your blog first thing in the morning)and wish you peace and comfort. There are no words just good thoughts and warm, hopeful wishes...

Kimberly

I am with Amy, I want to be on the list too! Everyone you have touched would do anything to help you feel better!!!! You have given us a window into your life and if we could take away the yuck we would in a heartbeat. Wrangle those nurses to give you all they got, there has got to be a feel good medicine somewhere!!!! I am an excellent hug giver, I just wish I could be there to give you one.
Suz the "Q"

Adrain,

Well, its been a few minutes since I typed your name and I can't think of one thing to write. It is clear we all feel a sense of helplessness trying to reach out and comfort you when we know we can't possibly begin to ease your pains. There are no words.

When you have had enough, when the road is too rough, you will find the peace you have been hoping for since this leg of your journey began.

Thank you for sharing your journey with us. Thank you for your honesty. Thank you for the many laughs and thank you for the tears. Thank you for making a difference in all of us. We are forever changed for having known you.

Peace be with you Adrian. -Tela

Adrian,

I don't think anyone in this world can fully grasp why suffering must exist. The only thing I do understand is that God has a perfect will for each of us. And, as unfortunate and sad it is for all of us to hear about your horrible suffering, God is surely using you to reach out to others....to make changes in this world that won't ever be forgotten.

Now, I believe 100% that Heaven is exactly the way the Bible describes. And Adrian, if you feel like you can't hold on anymore...........death is more about the people left living. Your legacy will live on and on. And, your loved ones will be with you again, someday. We are all mortal. It's just a matter of timing.

Your an awesome person who has made a difference in this world. How many people can say that?

Hugs,
Stacy
USA

You have no idea how important you are.

I'm really sorry you are feeling so rough - I hope you are feeling better soon.
You have been amazing - a massive inspiration to so many people including myself.
My prayers are with you - miracles can and do happen.

Hi Adrian

Just wanted to tell you that I am thinking of you and hope that you feel a bit better soon.

Congratulations on submitting the petition, it was wonderful to watch your progress during the day on the blog. You have brought a tremendous number of people together for this cause and lets hope the campaign goes from strength to strength.

Best Wishes

Rhian

Adrian, get some of the red stuff in you today (sadly blood and not red wine!) and you should hopefully feel a bit better...

Loads of people are thinking of you and rooting for you.

Keep strong fella!

Kirsten
x

Other then wishing you all the best, there is not much I can do for you this time, Adrian. I think what you are suffering from is withdrawl from the buzz you have been on in the past weeks, to see the petition off to a good start and now that this has happened, you have fallen into a little lul.

Any person who has been busy with a project as you have, feels this way. It's just that the whole project has allowed you to overcome your problems much easier.

Now there is nothing to keep your mind occupied anymore. And that is the only reason why you feel double bad at the moment.

Practicle advise would be to tell you to rest. Because catching your breath back is what you need. And I do hope the treatment you got today will help you back on your feet again.

Then, after that, there is only one other thing. Find a new project to sink your teeth in, or allow yourself to have this time and make it the best time ever together with your family.

Nobody will think any less of you, when you start thinking of Adrian Sudbury for a change.
And let's be fair, we, the onlookers, are not the people who feel your pain.

All we can do is wish you strength for the time you have left and hope it will be a pleasure.

Big hug,

Anna

Oh Adrian, if there was anything any of us could do to make you feel better, to beat the shit out of that tummy bug, rest assured we'd do it.

I know you're inundated with calls to 'stay strong' and 'keep fighting', as well as with suggestions for treatments. Selfishly I wish to repeat these calls but in truth you have fought a long hard fight. If you're tired of the fight and your levels are low, not one of your friends, at home or out here around the world, would fault you in the least for sitting back, holding your hands up and refusing to throw any more punches.

Your strength of character, honesty and lust for life which shines through so brightly have inspired us all and brought us all together in shared support of you, your campaign and in the desire to make a difference.

You're a legend! Small comfort perhaps but you will always be a legend, regardless of how much longer you find the will to fight.

All of our energy flows towards you, today and every day, all day. I know you might not be able to feel it physically but you can be certain it's sneaking under the doors of your parents home and through any open windows seeking you out, wrapping you in our love.

I wish so much for you Adrian. I am honoured to have met you.

Hugs from Trinidad - not any soft pansy hug, but the rib crushing, airway constricting, kind of hugs.
xoxox
Tash

Curse my feeble mind - forgot to attach the link. Stole another of your pics - particularly love this one of you in front of 10 Downing St. The life in your eyes!!

http://fabric-of-life-tash.blogspot.com/2008/07/when-it-rains-it-pours.html

Suppose if you insist I'll pay royalties for it :)

xoxo
Tash

Adrian,

I'm thinking of you constantly. You have done so much for this cause, and without doubt your campaign will live on long after you have left us...there's nothing wrong with giving in. You're not letting us or your family down by finding peace.

I hope your day brightens a bit.

Lots of love,

Devon

I am praying that God will bless you with less pain. I am praying that He will show you what He wants you to know about Him. I am praying that if this is indeed the end of your life here, that you can have peace. If it is not quite your time to go, then I am praying that you have strength and endurance. You have already been so brave. Take care of yourself, and surround yourself with the love that your family and friends have for you. I am thankful that I got to "meet" you through your blog. God bless you.

Just lay back and be pampered you deserve it, what you achieved at the start of the week was amazing no wonder you feel wiped out.
We are so very very proud of you.

Hope you have settled into hospital and they manage to find a solution for your stomach problems.

Praying for you always Adrian.
Peace and love.

X Marlene

Dear Adrian

Once the end of life is obvious, it should be gentle and easy. I hope this is what happens for you and your family too.

I am hoping that whatever time you have left can be spent in as little pain and discomfort as possible, with as many gentle moments and memories created.

Thinking of you always

love and light
Annie

Adrian,

My heart aches as I sit here and my stomach is slightly upset (in empathy with yours perhaps?). I do not want you to suffer. I do not want you to be uncomfortable. I wish I had words of comfort, something that I could do. I know that all of us reading would give anything to make you feel better. A gentle hug, a massage, something, anything.

It is natural to have a letdown after such a big event but being sick on top of that probably amplifies those feelings.

I hope that the hospital trip brings you some comfort and some time to just relax and float.

Be kind to yourself today. Find something that brings you some joy and comfort and focus on that.

I wish you peace and comfort today (and every day).

It upsets me so much that you have to go through all of this, and I'm so sorry that you are feeling quite down right now.

You have brought so much to my life. I wish so deperately, that I could do something for you. I hope it brings you a small amount of joy knowing that I am thinking of you every moment.

Hoping you will be feeling better after Hospital trip.

Love and well wishes,
Victoria

Adrian,

There are no words that can be of real comfort when you are in such pain but I am thinking of you and praying that you will be painfree and comfortable soon.

Best wishes,
Hilary

PS Great birthday cake!

You are an amazing inspiration Adrian and have changed the course of many,many lives for the better
from the bottom of my heart i send my love and good wishes to you . x

Darling, Darling Adrian:

I like the previous post from the guy who says lets "Sudders" it. Speak plainly, to the point.

I think we are all struggling with what to say..trying to find something that will stand out, touch you and your family, and Liam too. And worried that our words might be the last ons that make it to you. I struggle to write the same type of email to my dad every day. What can I say that will stick to his heart that he can take on his journey....

Nothing compares, no need to even try to assume I know how you feel...If you need to leave us now, go with love...you've got nothing left to proove, you've done more in your short lifetime than most dream of doing...

Remember as you enter this part of the journey that all of this love is not coming to you keystroke to keystroke...

Its heart to heart Adrian....

love,

Therese

Adrian.

Sending you loads of hugz and kisses..

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dawn xxx

Hi Adrian

I wish I could offer you some words of understanding. But I could never pretend, or patronise you, by leaving a message saying that I know what you're going through. I just want to say that your strength so far has been amazing, and you're a true inspiration. Of course, you're not always going to feel like that, and I'm sure that's normal. Just look at all the messages and support you're getting on here and try to take some comfort in them. It can't be easy for you at all Adrian, but don't ever give up.

Thinking of you with great admiration

Tony
x

Hello Adrian,

I wish I could offer some words of consolation. If you could distract yourself with magazines, a good novel or movie, something...

I hope that things improve and that tomorrow is a better day, and that you take comfort from all the commenters here.

Hannah
USA

Adrian

No words!!! Just thinking of you.....

xxxxreiki hugsxxxx
dawny

Dear Adrian,

It breaks my heart to hear you so desparate for relief and an end to what you are going through after suviving so much already.

Please know that our hearts go out to you from all over the globe. We would gladly hold a cold washcloth on your brow or stroke your back even if you find a drain to curl up on.

I yearn for a magical elixer that finally calms your stomach, restores a sense of calm, and gives you the energy you need to make it through this.

I know it is none of my business but for my grandma, they prescribed lorazepam, related to valium, but it had both an anti-nausea and anti-anxiety effect she so needed as she grew sicker. For her it was a godsend, nearly immediately calming her nausea and letting her rest.

I urge you and your family to not give up on finding help. Ask your parents to advocate for you that your medical team must find relief for you, and one you that doesn't knock you clear out. Dose matters so much.

And (last busybody comment for now) have they ruled out an ulcer??

Good luck, sweetheart. Like everyone, you deserve dignity and comfort. And some good laughs when you get back the first two.

With love always,
Margaret (USA)

Hi Adrian

Just logged on to see if you were feeling better honey. I don't know what to say other than I hope your pain is manageable, I hope you don't suffer too much and that you are in my thoughts all day.

Mel xx

It's seemed an awfully long day since posting this morning after reading your message, Adrian. I haven't been able to settle down to any work and have been checking the blog every hour.
Adrian, you are such a beautiful, gentle, courageous and inspirational young man. Everyone is so proud of you and your parents and sister must be bursting with pride.
I said in my earlier post, don't give up, but I haven't got the right to tell you that. This last monumental decision has to be yours, and yours alone. Be assured that whatever your decision, the love and admiration from all of us will go with you to wherever you wish to go.
Love,hugs and soothing thoughts to you and yours.
Christine M.XXX

As Therese above says...

"Remember as you enter this part of the journey that all of this love is not coming to you keystroke to keystroke...

Its heart to heart Adrian"

A lovely thing to say and so true.

And a lovely thing to say when so many of us can not find the words that we want to say at all.

Thank you Adrian - not only for all the work you have done that will save so many lives, but for changing us all in some way. For making us open our eyes to what is really important.

And right now, what is important is you.

So whatever choices you make now, please make them for YOU and do so in the knowledge that we are all behind you.

Love and peace to you and yours.
x

Hi Adrian... The truth is that there's no word that could make you feel better. My name is Natalia and I'm Peruvian. I accidentally saw an ad of your blog like 3 months ago or 2, I don't remember, and I started to follow your steps.. Sorry if my english is terrible!...
I just wanted to give you my support. I know God is with us and if I were you, I would try only to think in the great life that is waiting for me beside him. Stay strong, he is with you.

All the best for you... Natalia

Hi Adrian,

Sorry to hear you are feeling low and unwell.

Just wanted to say hi and that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I wish there was something they could do to make you better.

Adrian,

I'm so sorry you are in such pain. My heart breaks for you. I leave you with these words of encouragement:

2 Thessalonians 2:16-17
May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your heart and strengthen you in every good deed and word.

Prayerfully and respectfully,
Natalie USA

I am so sorry that you are feeling so terribly unwell. My sincere prayer is that the doctors can figure out something that can give you some relief!! Keep up the fight and please know that you are in the collective thoughts and prayers of so many.

Hello, so sorry that you are feeling so badly... still praying for you daily, you are in my thoughts and prayers... just like others have said, you are a truly inspiring man, and your strength and determination is truly amazing to me !
God bless you, sending hugs across the miles, Nancy B
P. S. I loved the picture of your birthday cake... funny !!!

Thinking of you,your family and friends today and sending much love to you all xx

Hello Adrian

No words can help now - it`s test of your character and everyone around you.This is truly awful for you but all these comments - what a tribute.

Mike,Emma, Tricia & myself send our love.

Best Wishes as always to you & your family.

Adrian,
No words I write seem anywhere near appropriate for all you continue to go through. I look at the pictures of you taking off your hat and how your radiant smile has touched so many people. May God provide you the comfort you so desperately deserve. I hope your stay in the hospital today provided you some welcome relief. Please know there are so many of us who continue to pray for you. You are so courageous and are the true meaning of the word "hero". So many prayers, love and hugs coming to you from Indiana, USA.

In love and spirit,
Shannon

Adrian,
You have given so much, suffered so much and inspired so many - I encourage you to focus inward and find the quiet, peaceful space that can't be touched by pain or worry. Let all of us who have grown to care about you so much, fill that space with the love and compassion that you have awakened in us.

In the Quaker community we have a saying, "I'm holding you in the light."

- Peter

Hi Adrian

As a fellow journalist I have lost count of the number of times I have heard someone described as an "inspiration".

Now I finally appreciate what that means, thanks to you. I will never use the word lightly again.

Wishing you all the best.

Adrian,

I just loved what Peter wrote. I am so sorry to hear that you are so uncomfortable and sad today. It is never easy to hear specifically when we all know there is so little if anything that we can do to help.

Please know that you are thought of around the world and that you have given strength to so many.

Sending you sunshine from California.

Much love,
Heather

Hi Adrian

So sad that you're feeling rotten today. I hope you'll feel better after your trip to the hospital.

Always thinking of you, you fantastic man!

Lesley
x

Hi Adrian,

no surprise, your today's writing, with all the energy you've put in the preparation for the trip to Number 10. It brought you (and your readers) 'the fun' and so let you (and us) forget for a day that leukaemia ruled your life for so many months. And it absolutely worked: we saw a confident journalist dealing with an exciting task in London on July 23, 2008.

And now that boast of adrenaline has gone - together with the red bulls and wines- leaving time for scary thoughts.

Actually you look much more healthy than your blood results tell. The pictures showed us an active young man, standing positive in a difficult life. So in my opinion a proper treatment in the hospital (blood, fluid, pain killers, positive support,…) can and will do wonders. These feelings of illness and depression will certainly not take ages…leaving all options open for the future.

a jazzy energy boast...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJrRldSssdo

...to remove the writer's (and much more serious) blocks...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqXhiHNKgTE&feature=related

...and simply restore a labadab dab dab life
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGikhmjTSZI

Hold on!
Ann

Adrian,

I am so sorry you haven't felt well. Do you know that your hope comes from the Lord?
Please have your parents read to you from the Bible. I would start with John 3:16. Read the Psalms. I know in suffering I find comfort just hearing God's word. The Bible is His love letter to all who believe. There is a life after this one. No tears, no pain, no loneliness, no suffering! What hope we have in Jesus! He loves you Adrian!

Living for Him!

Dana
Texas

I keep coming back to check in on you Sudders, all the while knowing that you're not feeling well enough to post again for the day.

I see, however, that I am not the only one who checks your blog hourly - Christine is a repeat offender (which gives strength to my conviction that I'm not a crazy stalker) and I know there are more :)

We sit here and in lieu of news from you we read what fellow "Sudders' friends" (cause we're more than fans) have been thinking and feeling throughout the day.

Peter's thoughts were lovely, and yes we do need to define Sudders. Well done Dan. You've created a whole community out here Adrian.

Some of us have even begun communicating with each other on other blogs... all of us out here checkin in on you as if the very act of reading the comments keeps us connected to you in some way.

We are all thinking of you, always!

Hugs, kisses and warm thoughts from an unproductive office in Trinidad :)

Tash

Dear Adrian

So sorry to hear the pain you are going through. You are so brave.

You have so many people wishing you well - hang in there you brave terrific person.

Angela x

Hi Adrian,

So sorry to hear that you are feeling so crappy - you have been through so much and have been so brave. It's not fair, is it? It's just not bloody fair.

Imagine though, how many good wishes and positive vibes are coming your way, how many people are thinking of you.

Your family seem absolutely amazing.

I know where you are coming from when you say that you just want to be alone - my dad was like that sometimes too.

Hope you're feeling a bit better soon,

Sam

x

Adrian
Feeling so sorry you are having such a rough ride at the moment. As well as kind words the best I can offer you is a huge virtual (((hug))). I really hope that you get rid of the symptoms and some more quality time. Just rest lovely, you have done so much this week.
Love Jo xxxx

Dear Adrian,

I'm so sorry to hear that you still feel awful and want to just curl up, go to sleep and not wake up again.

I would willingly swap places with you for a day if I could and if it would help. Unfortunately you wouldn't get too much of a break from aches and pains, but you would get a bit of respite. (Those you wonder what I'm talking about, this is me - http://www.postpals.co.uk/pals/Laura+H )

Some of the discomfort you feel today will be down to the overexertion of the past few days. I won't tell you to hang on in there and fight or that it's time to stop, only you will know which decision is the right one for you.

Please know that you are in my thoughts (and my families) and I will continue to check in on you. God Bless you for all the hard work you have put in on behalf of everyone who needs or will need “The Gift Of Life� in whatever form.

Laura
xxx

Dear Adrian,

I am still awake in the hope that I can hear something positive from you Adrian.

Sometimes think that a miracle will happen,how can somany peoples prayers go waste?!

My prayers,

Shiney

Hey Tyke lad
nice job at no 10 dear !!
No wonder you feel like crap today,tad too much excitment,never good for the tummy,eyes,platlets etc....
thinking of knocking up some chicken soup for you,helps with all,aml graft hostie thing oh and demands a recount for the snp's in glasgow.
Crap I have no idea what to say! (clearly) except hang on in there if you you have the notion,and I'll second that emotion(who sang that lovely boy ?)

Just checking in on you, as promised.

- nothing more to say. Hope tomorrow's a better day for you.

In my thoughts as usual,

Vic x

Oh Adrian, I hope by the time you get to read this the vampire juice is working and youre feeling better.
I really hope it does the job.....I hate to think of you feeling down. I'm sending positive vibes, love and light to you and your family ..........will have some wine with pals in your honour tonight and tell them about you and your story......hopefully the ripples on the pond will continue to spread.
Will check in again tomorrow. your mad old aunty (by proxy) Vasl x

Adrian, you're our man with hat
You've got lovely eyes, and it's as simple as that
They're the windows to your soul, and it shines right through
You let us catch a glimpse, and now we're full of love for you
Full of love for what you've shown
One man on a mission, but not on his own
You've got us out here, never forget
Even though most of us never have met
Did I forget to mention your smile?!
Can't find a rhyme - except 'crocodile'
I never claimed to be good at this stuff
But I try, so please excuse if it's rough
What I'm wanting to do is make you laugh
Again no rhyme - except 'giraffe'
I'll stop now, I know, it's conspicuous
My poetry's truly ridiculous...

~love from Alexandra (TAFKAI).

God I haven't even been drinking yet.........its Val actually I think Vasl (apart from sounding like a lubricant) is very apt for a Friday night. LOTS OF LOVE.....AND LIGHT .......AND EVERYTHING GOOD........is wished for you X

Damn Adrian, I feel so helpless I wish could take some of your pain, you don't deserve this.
Please know many people across the world are keeping you in their thoughts and prayers.

Sending you positive healing prayers,
Michael

Hey Adrian
You have just completed one HUGE HUGE mammouth mission. I'm not surprised it has 'taken it out' on you.
Many people shy away from even putting in a day at the office, never mind taking on a challenge like you have. What does that say?
A rest is firmly in order.

I am so angry that that the bl**dy stomach bugy things are causing you so much grief.
Did the sawbones give you anything to put them in their place?
Let us know how you are but if rest is priority, keep working Liam hard (he owes you for bringing the site into disrespute with that hat!)
xx

(had some computer problems but try again...)

no surprise Adrian, your today's writing, with all the energy you've put in the preparation for the trip to Number 10. It brought you (and your readers) 'the fun' and so let you (and us) forget for a day that leukaemia ruled your life for so many months . And it absolutely worked: we saw a normal journalist dealing with an exciting task in London on July 23, 2008.

And now that little bit of adrenaline has gone - together with the red bull and the wine - leaving time for scary thoughts.

Actually you look much more healthy than your blood results tell. The pictures in London and in the train reveiled an active young man, standing positive in a difficult life. So in my opinion a proper treatment in the hospital (blood, fluid, pain killers, positive support,…) can and will do wonders. These feelings of illness and depression will certainly not take ages…leaving all options for the future.

A jazzy energy boast…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJrRldSssdo

…to remove writer's (and more serious) blocks…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqXhiHNKgTE&feature=related

…and restore a labadab dab dab life
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGikhmjTSZI

Hi Adrian,

I am so, so sorry that you are feeling so shitty, physically, and emotionally. It stinks, it really does.

But the whole thing stinks, and yes, I know you know that more than me, so I am sorry to point out the obvious.

I have lost several of my family to cancer, of various kinds, and it is never easy. I just wish for you that you can retain as much dignity and ease as possible, and I am sure that your current low spirits will disappear - you have so much support and love around you, and you are clearly such a positive person ordinarily ... :-)

I also lost my partner 10 years ago. It was sudden (not from cancer) and totally unexpected. He went from alive to dead in the space of a 30 second phone call for me. It left no chance to say all the things that I wanted to say to him. Left me with many mysteries that I will never resolve. In knowing your fate, hard as it is, it gives you the chance that I never had - to do and say all those things that need doing and saying. It will be an immeasurable gift to everyone who loves you. I cannot tell you how important that is.

In the meantime, I do hope that your condition improves, you are an inspiration. I have been following your blog now since May, and many times I have wanted to post a reply but not known what to say. However, this time I felt I had some kind of relevant advice to give, depressing as it is.

Chin up mate, as long as you are feeling, even if its shitty, you are alive, and that counts for a lot!!!!!! Wine to drink, friends to talk to, books to read!!!!

Sending you strength and love, for what its worth, electronically!!!

Debbie

Hi Luv! is been a while...just want to say three words... I LOVE YOU! stay strongh.

Gah! It's maddening. I've been trying to keep my mind off of your misery all day by cleaning house. Clean a bathroom... check the blog... clean the playroom... check the blog. This lack of control is just excruciating for me. The "Mommy" in me always has to fix everything for everyone I care about, and I am helpless here. I feel like you're the kid brother I never had, and there you are in misery. I'd rub your back, I'd bring you tea, I'd lie next to you and hold your hand and watch a movie, I'd sleep in a chair next to your bed, I'd sing and dance and stand on my head to make you smile. But I can't. So, here I go scrubbing the freaking floors and feeling useless. I will send you a huge virtual hug and a smooch on the cheek and tell you, once again, that I pray that you find peace.
xoxoxoxoxoxox
Lacey

Dear Adrian-I am grieved to hear of your pain and understandable exhaustion of hanging on-you have accomplished so much-touched so many hearts-planted seeds that will grow and blossom wherever you find yourself. At the risk of angering your friends and family and all those from around the world that keep saying hang on- I want to say it's ok do it your way as best as you can. You've hung on admirably and no matter when you move on no one here will want to let go-it's the nature of life in this world. You are in my heart and prayer's although, like so many others we have never met---you will know when the time is right to let go---trust yourself and I hope you know you are surrounded by love both here and in the next world. My prayer for peace for you, your family and those who love you so very much. I pray for acceptance and for your Parents and sister who face this painful journey with you. God Bless and Thank you.

Adrian,

Your post today made me feel such great sadness as I read of my friends pain, this is a friend who I have not met but read all his words for the last 18 months so in my mind I think of you as my dear friend. I came back to the blog later in the day to see if there was an updated post and when there wasn't I decided to read again your amazing story. Repeatedly you talk in your blogs at the loss of not being a parent when it struck me that you are by definition a parent. The definition is "a person who brings up and cares for another", this is exactly what you have done for all of us who read your blog. You have taught us of your illness and how we can improve the world we live in to potentially help one another. You have shared with us your joy, sorrow and pain so that we can cherish each moment we have with you and those we love. You have cared for us with your words; been protective or careful to spoonfeed us the bad news. Those of us who read your blog are your children and we are better because we have been parented by you.

I know if we could each give you an ounce of strength, a pound of hope and the faith of prayer it will be nothing compared to the love you have given to us. You are always in my prayers that you do not suffer and you feel our love each and every day.

You've been an angel to so many people. It is heartbreaking to know you are suffering. God bless you and bring you peace and relief from your pain. We selfishly want to keep you with us as long as we can, but at the end of the day, all of us want you to be comfortable and free of pain. It's okay to let go, just know that you are very loved by many people and have made a huge difference in countless lives already. Love to you and your family. Thank you for touching our lives. We're with you to the end, whenever it may come, and beyond.

Hey Adrian,

I have no words, I just want to give you a massive hug.

Catherine x

Hugs all the way from New Zealand. I wish there was something I could do for you.

Lea White
http://whitesinnz.blogspot.com

Adrian - no words can express what my thoughts are, but please know I am thinking of you and hoping this god awful stomach bug clears up and you feel better. Through you I have a bit more insight as to how my husband felt going through treatment and death. You have helped me immensely and more importantly my young son.
Love xx

One thing is for certain you've suffered enough. I'm thinking about you and praying. I hope you'll feel better very soon.

R

Hi Adrian

I hope you soon rally and are feeling human again - though with everything you have achieved I am sure none of us out in the ether would complain about you feeling like this every now and again!

I just hope you were well enough to enjoy a glass of the wine?

Good job I signed my posting. Didn't mean it to be Anonymous.
Christine M.

Hi Adrian

Just checking in as another 'cyber-stalker' for the night shift!! - and agreeing with Tash and Christine M about everything that's been said really! Yes, I'm glued to my laptop too, sifting through all the fab comments, whilst desperately hoping for news that you're feeling better tonight.

All my love, positive vibes and another massive cyber-hug! Charlotte xx

Even Superheroes get tired. They want to hang up their suit and slip into the shadows. I cannot say I understand how you feel. I don't. It is cruel that you have to endure this. There is no cliche that will make you feel any better. I wish there were.

I won't tell you to hang tough. You should not have to hang at all. You should be allowed to relax the grip and rest. And feel comforted in your bed.

It is not fair, what you are going through. I ache for you. So many of us do. It's a pity that all of that can't take a bit of the burden from you.

So many of us gathering round you from around the globe.

Here's to feeling better, Superhero.

Hey Adrian,

Don't give up until you are ready to. Try and remember that even tho you feel totally rotton today there are still things that you can try and take some joy in like the love that is out there from all of us who are following your plight and all your family and friends.

Sending you all of my positive energy and hope for a bit some more good times still to come for you.

desperately hoping for news that you are perking up!

All of us cyber friends are out here thinking of you dude. Going on this journey right behind you and wishing that life wasnt so unfair!

Love Em x

Adrian - sending you love and gentle hugs. This is your journey, and only you can say when it starts to become too hard. All I can send you is love (real proper big love).

It shouldnt be like this. You are young, with so much to give and oh so handsome. Its too soon, but this is where you find yourself I guess. We are all here for you, sitting at our keyboards shedding silent tears for someone who, although we have never met, we care so much for. I hope you can find some comfort in the love of so many, but most of all in the love of your family and friends. My sister in law is now at a similar point in her life, and I hope you both find peace and comfort in that love. We all wish your suffering could be shared by us, its so bloody unfair.

With all my love - truly

Cheryl xxxx

I'm so sad that you feel so bad Adrian. I wish I could take it away from you. I can't so I'm sending you loads of hugs and cuddles to try and comfort you a little.

Big loves and prayers,

Carole
xxxxxx

After sifting through all these emails that send to you love, encouragement, energy and good wishes here's another one from across the pond (Los Angeles) wishing you whatever you wish for yourself right now! We all hate to see/hear of you suffering so. I'm so sorry about the suffering!!

I lost my dad four years ago to AML (acute myeloid leukemia) and after a while the blood and platelet transfusions no longer were of help - he'd had enough! I miss him everyday but am so glad that he's no longer suffering.

You are an amazing man, Adrian - you must never forget that! You've done more in a few short months than some have accomplished in a whole lifetime. You and your family should be so proud!

I pray for you and hope that your suffering becomes minimal very soon!

onwards and upwards!
love
Jane (Irvine, Calif., in the US of A) originally an Essex Girl before it was embarrassing to be an Essex Girl!

Just to let you know I'm thinking about you and you are in my prayers!

Take care,

Love fellow Sheffielder...Karla xx

Just to let you know you're in my thoughts and prayers. Life is so unfair, you don't deserve this.

Adrian,
I am sorry to hear that your spirit is down...you are such a light to the world even when you are feeling under the weather - know this for fact!

There are times for the world to hear your voice and be in your presense, and other times when you need to be you (away from the world's view). Strengthen yourself, mentally and spiritually first. Fuel yourself, then fuel the world! We'll be waiting to hear your smile catching every heart! Thank you for your indomitable spirit!

Much love from the state of Colorado in the USA!

Adrian

Hope today's visit to the hospital has made you feel better.

Thinking of you always and send you lots of hugs & kisses. I just feel so helpless that there's nothing else I can do to ease your suffering.

Hope you sleep better tonight

Lots of love

Lisa x

Watching Frost and reading blog comments is not terribly easy, but like the rest of us I just want to remind you that you are my hero.

Even feeling ill and miserable you manage to find the time to write, and while I haven't been where you are yet, I do know the feeling of wanting just to be miserable on my own.

As I've said before, as a Mum I really would love to be able to kiss it better, make it go away, make the good cells win the fight against the bad cells, do anything to make it better for you and your family.

I have just had a thought. I wonder if you find us intrusive now, if you just want to be with your family and rest for a while? If you do you should say so or get Liam to tell us. I am sure none of us will mind (though I would still want to make sure you are OK) Lacey cleaned her house, Christine kept checking the blog and me, I sit and watch tele with my laptop on my knee just so I can keep an eye on things.

If wishes were horses beggars would ride, if we all could give you a drop of our health you would be well, but as that doesn't work perhaps a small wish for strength from each of us will help a little and maybe the vampires you keep playing with will do what we can't and give you a bit of health for a while.

You know, whether wonderful or not the last few days would have taken their toll on a healthy person, I'm not surprised you're tired. Relax for a day or two, sleep lots, eat as much as your stomach can stand and enjoy.

Hugs xxxxx

Dear Adrian

What can I say that hasn't already been said? Another one who has been checking in all day hoping for a glimmer of good news. Hope you manage to have a restful night, in hospital or at home, we all just hope for better news tomorrow.

Yvonne

Adrian

You did a fantastic job in London but I'm so sorry to hear that things aren't good for you at the moment. I hope the hospital visit has made you feel more comfortable. Take strength from all you have achieved and all the people who are rooting for you, we're all willing you to pull through. You really are an inspiration.

Oh Adrian, only now I have logged on to your blog as my daughter is home and we have been out and about. So much advice and so many well wishes from so many who love and admire you around the world. I too want to tell you to hang on, keep fighting but alas I cannot do that. You have fought and hung on so bravely, as did my dear brother, but no one knows the pain and exhaustion that you are suffering better than you. Not one of us would expect you to hang on or keep fighting if it becomes too much for you dear Adrian. All I wish is that you find relief from your suffering. Your constant companion in this journey Chris

Hi, been following your blog for ages now and felt I needed to join in with the thousands saying what a incredibly strong minded man you are,you are truly an inspiration to us all, hope your visit to the hospital has made you feel a little better.
Sending lots of love and best wishes
take care
Alison

Many frequent thoughts of you today while I was busy working, checking on you often as a Mom does. I too wish I could take away the discomfort. Please know and believe that God is with you and your family in this journey, especially now when you're at such a low point.

Wishing you comfort and peace. Rest easy.

Mary Anne
Cincinnati, OH
USA

Brother A,

You are a star.

Nothing, nothing is worse than being sick for so long and not getting any relief. It is beyond frustrating! I do not blame you for wanting to curl up in a ball and die. In fact, I think that is perfectly normal to feel that way. The thing to remember is that you are going to have good days and you are going to have bad days. It's just the way it is. Even though you had a rough end to your big day on Wed. you still had an amazing day. You did something incredible. You cannot forget that day and the amount of good that you did for the world, even if now things seem quite awful.

I was reading your post yesterday from your times in isolation and how you prayed to God to know that someone out there loved you. You felt let down because it didn't seem to happen or relieve your emotions at that time. I imagined how lonely you must've felt and just how difficult the general situation must've been. Then I realized that God still gave you your wish.

Look at all the people now around the world who love you and want only the best for you. People who wish they could be with you and have the power to take your pain away. You got your wish Adrian, you just got it a little later than you thought.

I'm not a big bible/religion person but I do love the Gospel of Mary. It's quite mind blowing in a lot of aspects. One of the quotes is "For those who have ears, let them hear." You put it out there Adrian and a lot of people heard you. So many people around the world send their very best wishes and prayers your way, every day.

Two weeks ago someone gave me a Brazilian wishing bracelet. You tie a knot and you make a wish, you wear it until it falls off. My wish was for you. Someone I never met but care for all the same. I wished you comfort and happiness. My wishes usually come true so I have big hopes for this one too!

I hope you start perking up over the weekend so you can enjoy yourself.

All the best blessings headed your way
from a little area across the pond
by the name of Ocean Beach, CA.

Love, Beth

Hey Adrian,
You've done it again! Got your lovely face on TV. I turned the laptop off for 10mins to cool down and there you were on Calendar at 11.35pm delivering the petition to No.10!
It was advertising the Bone Marrow event at the Galpharm Stadium on Sunday.
It was lovely again to see you looking so happy.
Sleep easy and dream beautiful dreams.
Christine M.XXX

Hi Adrian,

Sorry to hear your feeling unwell, I do hope the bloods do the trick and get ya pecker back up!!

You're an amazing guy, who has acheived so much with the petition and making everyone aware of your plight. Well done to you hun.

I wish you well and you're in my thoughts, keep your chin up sunshine
Take care

Hugs & snogs
Donna xxx

Dear Adrian,

We met, briefly, many years ago; we weren't friends but nor were we enemies.

I have only been made aware of your situation, and your blog, in the past couple of days. I am not sure I have any words to say which are different from the many wonderful messages you have already received, but I must say this:

You Sir, are truly an inspiration.

Hey Adrian,

We've never met but I'd love to give you a cuddle now - you are such an inspiration and continue to be so every day - your courage and strength to write how you are really feeling is incredible.

I feel privilaged to take this journey with you and your cheeky grin.

Sending positive thoughts from Glastonbury.

Tracy

XXX

Adrian

I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. My thoughts are with you. I am sure there will be moments when you can still enjoy life, even up to the end. There is always something to look forward to.

Love

C xx

Reading all these comments I know there is nothing more I can add except we all love you and wish you peace in whatever form it comes.
Alison x

Adrian, sorry you are feeling so dreadfully lousy. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Your campaign is truely fantastic, but your blog has also been an inspiration for those us having to deal with illness and uncertainty in our lives. My dad has recently been diagnosed with advanced bowel cancer and it is amazing how we have moved from total shock and despair, to hope that his treatment will be successful and realising that we need to live in the moment and not spend every minute thinking about his cancer. For me personally, reading your blog has enabled me to appreciate that the here and now is precious. It is wonderful to read that you have been having a blast with family and friends and making the most of every moment. I wish you a comfortable and peaceful time ahead surrounded by the many people who love you. Thank you so much for everything you have done and everything you have written.

Love and prayers,

Elaine

Dear Adrian,
Wishing you a better day tomorrow, and a rush of warmth, love and comfort, from all of us who've come to know and admire you.
love,
Breda Kennedy

You are in my thoughts.

I once upon a time drove past a fellow that was running along Glen Drive in Port Coquitlam, BC. I smiled and waved and gave him a thumbs up, and thought to myself.. wow, look at that guy go... running along on with one artificial leg. He waved back, and little did I know at the time (and probably him included) that I was waving at someone soon to be famous... as it was Terry Fox training for his Marathon of Hope.

You are an inspiration. I am wishing that your journey changes the world, just as his did.

Hi Adrian,
I hear you...thankyou for your bravery in telling it like it is. You continue to amaze me with your strength of character.
To your Mum and Dad, I would like to say what a fabulous son you have and that his spirit has spread around the world and given a voice to many other young cancer sufferers.
love and respect
Clare

Your quality of life needs to improve, hopefully tomorrow will be better. As people hve already said the campaign is fantastic and is something that keeps many people with illnesses or uncertainty going. The petition results of over 11,000 are fantastic!!! Life will get better for you, just keep your head up!

Vicky
London

I'm so sorry that you are having such a bad day. I hope your visit to the hospital for blood will make you feel much better. Your story is truly an inspiration. My daughter found her bone marrow donor on the national registry and had her transplant last September. We just found out today that she has pneumonia. She had been doing so well and it was right after I let her go out in public for the first time that she got sick!! Even sick, she is helping me to plan the bone marrow drive we are putting on next month. We wanted to give a little something back, so we are planning a huge community bone marrow drive here in the states in Myrtle Beach. We will continue to keep you in our thoughts and prayers.

Dear Adrian, This latest post of yours brought me back to YOUR reality. We get wrapped up in what you are accomplishing and not what you are living. We have all had you on a pedestall for so long now. We have all praised you as being soooo super human and soooo remarkable. My dear Arian, you have been remarkable, but you ARE only human and I believe that we only have so much fight in us.
People get broken and people get tired. This sucks and I hate this. I have followed this blog and live a world away from you and feel like you are part of my family, a friend, someone I want to strive to be in your achievements and love for people. You don't have to fight for this cause anymore. You have accomplished that. Lives will be saved because of you. If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired it is ok to let go. We will miss you. We will NEVER forget you. I pray for some better tomorrows for you but mostly I pray for THE eternal tomorrow for you when you aren't suffering anymore. You and your family are in my prayers constantly and I have so many prayer warriors carrying you too. Peace, Adrain, Debra

Hugs from me too. And so much love. I wish I could give you comfort as much as you've inspired me. Know that I'm thinking about you!

What a beautiful piece of heartache
This has all turned out to be
Lord knows we've learned the hard way
All about healthy apathy

I use these words pretty loosely
There's so much more to life than words

There is a me you would not recognize, dear
Call it the shadow of myself
And if the music starts before I get there
Dance without me, you dance so gracefully
I really think I'll be okay
They've taken a toll, these latter days

Nothing like sleeping on a bed of nails
Nothing much here but our broken dreams
Oh, but baby, if all else fails
Nothing is ever quite what it seems

And I'm dying inside to leave you
With more than just cliches

There is a me you would not recognize, dear
Call it the shadow of myself
And if the music starts before I get there
Dance without me, you dance so gracefully
I really think I'll be okay
They've taken their toll, these latter days
They've taken their toll, these latter days

Tell them it's real
Tell them it's really real
I just don't have much left to say
They've taken their toll, these latter days
They've taken their toll, these latter days

Latter Days - Over the Rhine

Adrian & co,

greetings and strength from our Haemato team in Antwerp, Belgium
http://hematologieantwerpen.skynetblogs.be/post/6092162/song-give-me-strength

Let the WE be a real WE without medical problems!

Dear Adrian,

So sorry to hear that life sucks today. I hope tomorrow brings you some comfort and peace. You are in my and many other people's thoughts. Hang in there if you can.

Dear Adrian,

I was just calculating UK time and Indian time and thought will check to see if you are awake.I hope everything is better now and you are sleeping peacefully.

You are always in my thoughts and prayers.We all just want you back and we are all waiting for you to be better today.

Lots of love and prayers.

Shiney

Adrian,

I hope that the drop of the red stuff has picked you up a bit this morning.

I know how difficult this is for you - but please take comfort in what you have achieved. You are a real inspiration to so many people and the level of awareness you are raising is absolutely amazing.

Please continue to enjoy this time with your family. They love you so much.
Take care.

Diane x

Good Morning Adrian,

Saturday again. Remember a week ago, when you asked us to look at the petition because there were only a few days left to sign it. See all you have accomplished now?

And that was all in a week. One hectic week with your personal pressure to want to leave something good. Which you did!

One hectic week, in which you had to gear up for that long and beautiful trip to London, no matter how bad you felt. Which you did!

Last week, you did (in spirit and for real) what Marathon runners do, no, what people do who run several Marathons in a row. You gave your all, and then you had to admit to yourself that you had done it!

YOU DID IT, Adrian!!! You ran your own personal Marathon, maybe three times over in that last week.

Don't feel bad when your body tells you it is time to have rest for a while. That will change again now that you actually have time to rest.

You are a writer. And a very good one at that. You wanted to write about the scientific part of medicine. Well... there is so much to write about in that field, that you will have plenty to choose from. Even the things related to your personal field of expertise.

That can't wait.

And that paper you wrote about Obesitas, that needs to be found again as well. And published again.

Ask yourself, what would an athlete do? After the big event? They would go back on the tracks, and walk around, despite the acking bones. So, be like the athletes, Adrian. Sink your teeth in a new writing track.

Baby steps for sure, this first week. But then, when you get your pen to do the running again, you will soon be able to handle pain again as well. What do you want to write about next?

Anna

PS. Have a good weekend.

Adrian,

So sad to hear you are still feeling ill :( I hope by the time this gets to you, you are feeling better and stronger and not so fde up. thinking of you and sending you some warm Gibraltar sunshine and loads of love, so many people here are with you and your campaign.

HUGs & Kisses

Mich xoxoxox

Hi Adrian
I was awake early thinking about you and I remembered that many years ago my son had a stomach 'bug' that lasted for two months. He'd had antibiotics that only seemed to make things worse - they strip the natural bacteria from the gut? A medic friend suggested he try a course of Acidopholis - which is the natural bacteria found in the gut, and it sorted him out.

Are there any medics reading this who could advise; would it be worth proposing this to your care team?

I know you are more than capable of doing the research yourself - just as long as it doesn't conflict with other issues your body is dealing with!!

Hold in there

Hugs and love, Denise

Dearest Adrian, it broke my heart to read your blog yesterday, I like many others logged on hourly in the hope of hearing more positive news. I hope that blood and platelets worked, and this morning you feel energised...there must be thousands of us willing a miracle.
Lots of love and hugs Helen X

Sending you love, Adrian.

May all of us on your blog give you strength Adrian.
I hope you feel a little better after the bloods.
Stuart

Dear Adrian, I hope and pray that you'll feel so much better after your Hospital visit, and that your medical team sort out your stomach problems. You don't deserve this after all that you have suffered. Thinking of you constantly and praying that the next time we hear from you, you're feeling a lot better.
Love & best wishes
Sandra

Hey Adrian,

Bummed to hear your feeling so bad. Hopefully you will feel better after the hospital visit. Glad we can be here for you. Must be easier to write how you feel than to share with those close to you. I envy your ability to set this up I am so not computer savy. Read your updates daily and you are in our thoughts daily. Sending well wishes your way. I would think it stinks to be so young and so sick. When my father was on the cancer unit we met a young girl in her early twenties that had recieved bone marrow transplant and had to stay in the hospital. I often wonder how she is doing. Her and her mother were both so positive. Election time is heating up over here both candidates will be verbally bashing each other soon. Weather has been very warm. Is there anything you would like people from different parts of the world to send you. It might be kind of cool to have everyone send a postcard from where they are from. You would have a pretty diverse collection. Maybe if you gave us an address. I was just trying to think of something. Take Care. Love,
Deb and family
Ohio U.S.A.

Hi Adrian,

I have been out of action for a few days and have just been catching up on the blog from the fantastic day at Downing Street to your latest post and how crap you are feeling......nothing I can say that hasn't already been said, just know that we are all sending you a huge amount of love.I can understand the enough is enough feeling...just hang on in there sweetheart and I hope the trip to the hospital helps you some.

Love to you and yours
Nicki

No postcard but some world music...

'…whose songs echoed with the joys and sorrows they had experienced during their lives.'

http://www.cumbancha.com/albums/umalali

http://www.myspace.com/anaifa

This WE - 'a world to listen to' at Sfinx in Boechout (B) - we like to share.

Hi Adrian,
I have never ever left a comment on a blog. But I feel like I just have to let you know that people all over the world are thinking of you (I'm in Australia) and basically what a crap situation you are in. I can't remember which link led me to this blog but I started at the beginning a week ago and read through - I was in tears reading especially as I just kept thinking there 'has' to be a happy ending - but real life gets in the way of that. The post about you and poppy breaking up totally sucks. But you were so gracious about it - and I know she lived through some incredibly difficult times with you but it just..well I guess I was just angry that she didn't stand by you, even if the wedding was cancelled or whatever. Anyway getting off track, just wanted to say I'm thinking of you. My husband is an English citizen and I asked him to sign your petition - he had a look but said he couldn't because he doesn't have a UK residential address (as we live permanently in Oz).
Lenore

Hope that it is a GOOD morning, Adrian,
Thousands of others, like me, will have had you in their tossing and turning thoughts all night.
I was up at 7.30 am as I couldn't stay in bed any longer and just wanted to start checking the blog again to see if any news today is good news, but the system wouldn't let me post a message till now.
Wishing this beautiful day brings you peace and tranquility.
All the Love, kisses, hugs and soothing thoughts in the world to you, lovely Adrian, and yours.
Christine M.

I hope you feel a bit better after your transfusions

Pam xxx

Hi Adrian,

I was sent a link to your blog via friends from the Live Life Then Give Life campaign (livelifethengivelife.com). I started to read your blog from the beginning and ended up not moving and reading the whole lot in one go. I find your inner strength incredible and very inspiring.

I am 23 and am waiting for a kidney transplant. Due to the fact that there is not enough donors out there I have been waiting 4 and a half years. (I won't bore you with tales of dialysis but my blog is here - http://questforakidney.blogspot.com if you ever did want to have a gander)

Anyway, I think your campaign is utterly AMAZING, as I am sure it will make a big difference not just with bone marrow donations but with encouraging people to sign up to the UK Transplant list too, no doubt saving many, many lives.

I wish you all the best where ever you go next.

With lots of hugs and pork pies,

Holly xxx

Adrian

you have been an inspiration to many. Unfortunatley my future son-in-law is in a similar position, but he has acute myloid leukemia and things are happening much faster. He is 22, and is marrying my daughter on Thursday in Oxford where they met at Uni. She is from Leeds so we have seen a lot of your campaign on the local news. The petition has been great, and we have had donor clinics (the last one in Garforth last week), and we told everyone to register. Keep going, and keep being an inspiration as you undoubtedly are. I have my daughters wedding to look forward to, though i do not think there is much more for poor Matt to look forward to. Enjoy every experience you can, cheers

Hope you're feeling better today, I've been thinking about you lots and hope you are able to let us know how you're feeling today...

I miss you when you're not blogging...

Take Care

Kirsten
x

Dear Adrain,

I do not know how many times I check daily this blog.I really hope you are feeling better today.

Two days back I had a very disturbed sleep, dreams about you or your illness, dont really remember, just know that I had a very bad night.May be because you are constantly in our thoughts.
Please do get well fast.Wants to meet you one day,I hope I can.

Have a peaceful, pain free day.

Regards,

Shiney

Adrian

Sorry to hear you have been feeling so rough. I hope you are feeling a bit better today.

BIG hugs

Jane xx

Sending you love and well wishes today, Adrian. I hope and pray that you're feeling better.

Hi Adrian, I think the silence from you tells its own story. I am always amazed at the depth of feeling when I read the comments on your blog. I have a picture in the shop with Abraham Lincolns quote "It's not the years in our life but the life in our years." You have certainly put more life in your years than many who live to a much greater age. Thinking of you and wishing you peace. Chris

Hi Liam,

Could you please give us an update if Adrain is not feeling well?

Little worried about his health, but I still hope some miracle will happen.

Regards,

Shiney

Liam could you please give us an update on Adrian. thinking of him all the time.

Just to say you are all in my thoughts and hope to hear Adrian is feeling a little brighter in a day or two. Understandably, placing an entry on here is not the uppermost thing on your minds at the moment so rest assured we are all thinking of you constantly and sending our love. We're always here.

Adrian, I hope you are finding some respite from the discomfort and unease you are feeling. Anything that helps you has got to be ok - that's all that really matters.

Hoping you are sleeping peacefully with no pain or nausea, and that tomorrow you will wake a little better.

Liam, hope you are ok too...

Much love as always
Barbara xx

Adrian,

AMAZING is the one word that comes to mind when thinking of you, your family and friends. The impact that you have left on our WORLD will forever be felt and will continue to inspire.

My adult life has been in medicine. Being so I bring a somewhat different message. I believe that when we are faced with pending death our natural instinct is to ask the ones we love to hold on and fight. But I have seen that what is truly needed is permission from loved ones to stop the fight. The human spirit will hold on for a length of time for those around us. I have seen it and it is wonderful for those that have unsettled lives. But Adrian ..... your life is more then settled it has become more then you probably ever imagined and your family and friends will have that to hold on to. =) What an amazing gift to them !

With Peace and Comfort .... Have a Happy Day !

Alyce
California,USA

It's late morning here in the US, in my corner of the world. Being the Mom that I am, I too jumped online right away to see how you are today.

I agree with Alyce - Adrian, it sounds like it's time to lay back, savor what you have accomplished, and sleep, rest, just "be" as long as you are able to be on this Earth. Let go and let God take over now - you life is (and always has been) in His capable hands.

Wishing you and your family much PEACE, today and every day, in the time to come.

Mary Anne,
Cincinnati, OH USA

Does your positive effect and inspiring spirit have no limits? Now Lacey's got a clean house and on your head be it. You should be proud :)

And it has to be said, Christine, you've crossed the threshold and now fit smartly in to the stalker category - red hearts speaking? :)

Welcome Charlotte...

And you've inspired others to dabble in poetry - that's our Sudders!

And here I am again. Checked in on you last night, well at 4am this morning my time when I got home - So I guess I'll jump on the stalker band wagon.

Rosemary has a point. It takes quite long to read through comments every day. Don't want to detract from your time with your family.

Don't for one minute feel obliged to log on and tell us how brill you feel and how you've been buoyed by all our love and support. Love and support can go far, but as you are painfully aware, when you feel so physically low and it's a battle to even speak to those around you.. ack, what I'm trying to say is that just because you know we want to hear that you're brighter today, you don't have to consider us in this. Your honesty has always been something we respect and cherish.

That said, I truly hope you are feeling more comfortable today.

Just had our first REAL storm of the rainy season - twenty toes weather for sure. Hesitant to drive out of my valley as I'm sure there's flooding. So sending you hugs from a water-logged Trinidad
xoxox
Tash

Hey Adrian,
There are so many beautiful AND cheeky comments on this blog (Tash!!). I said that voices were speaking, not the red hearts (who's crossed the threshhold now lol :) ).
Lovely Adrian, I really do hope that you have had a happier, more peaceful day and are feeling much brighter that early morning yesterday.
We are with you all the way, whichever road that is.
Love, kisses, hugs and soothing thoughts to you and yours.
Christine M.xxx

Hello fellow blog readers. Isnt it strange how when there is no news from Adrian to pass the time readers have started to communicate with each other. This is truly a global family. I think that I probably qualify for official stalker status and no doubt this will open the flood gates for many more to declare themselves guilty and proud to be so. Chris

Just stopping by again to say "Hi" and to say I'm thinking about you.

Afternoon Adrian; afternoon blog family / fellow stalkers!!

...Don't know what the weather's like for you Adrian, over where you are, but it's boiling here in Chester! (true Brit you see - when in doubt as to what to say, talk about the weather - and preferably moan about it - lol!!)

I've checked the blog throughout the day, thought about you often, done absolutely no cleaning or anything constructive whatsoever!! ...I just hope and pray that you're comfortable. I really feel for you.

I'll stop by again later!!

Love and warmest wishes to you and those around you, Charlotte xx

Hi Adrian, hi all...

A quiet Saturday for we in Adrian's Army, returning often to check in and say hi to you and to each other.

Hoping you've had an ease from that tummy bug and regained some semblance of a quality of life for the weekend.

Sending you more warm wishes, tight hugs and "talking hearts" :)

PS - Charlotte, the least you can do is follow Lacey's example and clean the house :) :)

On another note: Been wanting to let Lenore know that although Poppy may have broken off the engagement, I get the impression that she is still standing by our boy! Don't want the wrong impression to be given. Correct me if I'm wrong Sudders - but I recall you mentioning Poppy was there sometime recently spending time, perhaps it was for your birthday?

Lots of love to you, our inspiration.

I hope your fighting resolve has returned Adrian, but if it hasn't, I'm sure I represent all your virtual 'family' in truly empathising with your situation.

Only you will know when you are ready. But I do selfishly hope it is a long way off. I hope you can still find the strength to find some enjoyment with those you love, if not please please may you find the peace you so desperately wish for.

All my love and reiki hugs

dawny

Hello Adrian (and everyone else checking in on him) - logged on a lot today to see if you're ok but I suppose you're still feeling bad - I really hope you feel better soon.

You have some really lovely, wonderful and big hearted friends on your blog, reading through all the other comments is a lovely thing to do, I'm sure these amazing people help you to get through the tough days.

Take it easy, write soon when you're up to it and have a good night.

Kirsten

Anyone want to come over and eat off my floors?? :-)
I'd love to say that I dealt with my stress in only healthy, productive ways, but once the house was clean, I turned to red wine! Okay, wine is semi-healthy, but when I'm stressed I tend to have more than one glass. (hicc.) Now, for the record I am officially an obsessive-compulsive DRUNK stalker. Fabulous.
Adrian, I hope you're resting and feeling better. I'm worrying/thinking about you and your family constantly. Liam, please update us with anything you know about our boy. I know you must be upset and concerned, too, since he's such a good friend of yours, so my thoughts are with you during this difficult time as well.

Lacey

Hello again

not doing more poetry, don't worry!
Just want to let you know I have been thinking about you all day.
love from
~Alexandra.

Hi Adrian x

***

Hey Alexandra - loved your poem (Particularly the 'giraffe and laugh' bit!)

Made me crocodile...
:O)

Evening Adrian

Hope you haven't written because you've been resting and not because you're feeling really unwell. You know Adrian, we all keep telling you what a hero you are, but I think, more importantly in some ways you are also a thoroughly nice person. No-one could generate this amount of caring without being very very special.

So, build your strength, take all our thoughts as being caring and use them as a prop to help, if we can at all.

Hugs xxxx

sorry to hear you are rough mate, just hang on in there, you are not alone we are all with you,
keep the faith, martin

Just checking in once more, and reading all the comments above, isn't it amazing how a young man most of us here have never met face to face has secured a place in our hearts, today and always. Such is the power of Adrian! And, as has been said above, in some cases we are talking to each other and making new aquaintances. Can I just say to Byron Godfrey and family that I hope Thursday is a beautiful day in every sense - my thoughts are with you too.

Also, as Tash mentions above, this can't be an easy time for Poppy - I can't begin to imagine how she is feeling. And I hope Lacey is still sober - What will she be up to next...lol! It's good we can keep each other's spirits up!

Let's hope Adrian is getting the rest he needs and is so deserving of and that tomorrow will be a better day...Goodnight and sleep soundly Adrian...your cyber family are there with you and we love you heaps and heaps!

Sending you comforting gentle hugs and much love
Barbara xx

Hi Adrian,

I feel ever so sorry for u and wish there was something that i could do to help ease ur pain and sickness.
I think u r such an amazing man and u will always be remembered for all the hard work and time and effort u have put in to raising awareness. U don't deserve what u r going through and the pain u r suffering.
I hope u get some relief very soon.
Hang in there. I can't begin to even think about how u must be feeling, but always remember u mean alot to people and u have touched so so many hearts.

Take care
Love as always
Mary. xx

Hey Adrian just checking that there hasnt been a note from you before I close for the night. From the amount of wine that is being consumed in celebration one minute and concern the next I think your supporters might all end up alcoholics before too much longer. Wishing you a good nights sleep Adrian Chris

Hey Sudders,

It's now 9:30pm in the UK so I'm trying to prepare myself for another night of no news as I highly doubt you'll be posting so late, though you do seem to be a bit of a night owl at times.

Evidently activity will continue here in your absence as we all check in regularly.

Lacey - will eat off your floor if I can have a marguerita to go with your wine. My poison last night - which explains why I logged on, read comments (my screen was somewhat blurred - hicc), and forgot to post one of my own, when I got in during the wee hours. Needless to say, today I have NOT been cleaning. Ugh!

Barbara - thanks so much for your kind words over the past few weeks. I have no other way to contact you but know that everything you've said to me has warmed my heart.

Alexandra - your poetry is brill :) I'm with Trac - it made me "giraffe and crocodile"! You've made up your own cockney rhyming slang... henceforth a giraffe and crocodile shall be a laugh and a smile!

Warm wishes for a restful night of sleep Adrian. Thinking of you and yours constantly.
xox
Tash

Hi Adrian,
Gosh,hope you're having a laugh at the content of our postings today.Tash is very hyper (think it's the rain) and I'm never going to live down my wierd imaginings about the "talking"? red hearts am I? lol:) It's our way of dealing with the silence and we hope that it cheers you up.
Dear Tash, It's not our fault it's bucketing down in Trinidad. he he, but it really has been too hot in Chester and Huddersfield to bother about silly things like cleaning :)
It made more sense to sit quietly and watch the blog, post a little message and hope someone is passing all the funny bits on to you, lovely Adrian.
It's coming dark now and I know that we all hope that when the sun rises in the morning we have word that you are feeling stronger.
Love, kisses, hugs and soothing thoughts to you, lovely Adrian, your family and friends and all your blog family. I get the feeling we all need them today.
Christine M.

Adrian, not much to say apart from thinking of you and yours.
Stalkers (class myself as one too) could we add a sloppy bug onto the list for a hug?
Love and light and lots of sloppy bugs to you Adrian (only had one glass of white tonight so far) Val x

hey its Marie again!(from sweden)Wroted to u earlier. Im sorry to see that you have almost give up, but i totally understand you. You are so brave ! Just wanted to say that its my turn in 4 weeks. Will think of u then! And try to be as brave as you are, if thats possible. I really really wish that u dont had to suffer like you do. If i could, i would take some from you and put on myself for a while. Many hugs from sweden!

Scratch the bugs..........so to speak. Don't like it in the wake of stomach bugs etc.
Sorry...my attempt at a bit of poetry is rubbish.
Am going off to have another glass of white.
Hope youre o.k. Val x

Hi Sudders,

Your posting yet again made my eyes swim with tears. As did the picture of you in your suit outside No.10! I'm so proud of you Sudders.

Please try and have some 'me time'. Have some time to think and care for you and not put pressure on yourself to be a certain way because thats how you feel you should be.

I hope that the stomach probs settle down soon for you and that after your blood and platelets you feel much better.

Sending you a big big cuddle and a sloppy kiss (oo-er!)

Dear Adrian,

Sending you lots of strength, love and warmest wishes from Bonaire.

Ingrid

Hi Adrian; hi fellow stalkers!!

Just got back to my hot and (still, as yet) 'uncleaned' house!! As usual, the first thing I do is fire up the laptop and hit the little 'Baldy's Blog' feed button thingy at the top! Whilst nervously waiting for the page to load, I examine the contents of my wine rack...

Mind if I join you all for a glass (or two)? Seems as though I'm not the only one indulging tonight! I propose a toast to you Adrian! I so wish we'd all 'got together' under happier circumstances, but you are an absolute star, you've changed people's lives in ways you may not have imagined possible - and I drink to that!! ;-)

I'll leave it there for now, before I treat you to some of my own special brand of poetry - the type that's brought to you in association with a good Aussie Cabernet Sauvignon!!

Love, energy and positive vibes, Charlotte xx

Hi Adrian (and everyone else)

Well, I'm breaking with what would seem to be tonight's tradition and indulging in a Pepsi Max rather than some wine. (Rock 'n roll eh?). I'd like to join in with the toast all the same though if that's ok?

Another one here who's been refreshing the page every couple of hours hoping for some better news today. I hope the reason is you've been enjoying the sunshine and each other's company rather than being sat in front of a silly computer screen.

That post of yours broke my heart Adrian, but thank goodness for your blog where you can type out your fears and hopefully by all the magnificent responses you can get some small crumb of comfort and relief.

I so hope yesterday at the hospital has given you some respite and some extra strength and finally some relief from the blasted nausea and stomach troubles.

It's my birthday tomorrow, and honestly more than anything else I really really hope you feel so very much better. I mean that.

Just to echo everyone else, Byron and family all the very best for this week, and Holly had a quick look on your blog and will keep my fingers crossed for you and for some good news soon. Elaine too, thoughts to you and yours and especially your Dad.

Everyone else enjoying your vino tonight, don't get too sozzled. Oh gawd, why not? Enjoy!

Everyone sleep well...be as snug as bugs in your rugs. (ahem...that's my bit of poetry for tonight).

Take care
Toni xxxxx

Dear Liam:

Is there any news at all of our beloved Ad?

Its amazing he has brought so many people together....and we are all family near and far as a result of this blog.... We've come to rely on a post to Adrian from each other as sort a news .....

God bless you all ...

Heart to heart Adrian, heart to heart.

love

therese

Dear Adrian,

A friend recently told me all about your campaign and the situation that you are in, so I decided to immediatly try and contact you to offer my support and best wishes for everything you have been through and what you are trying to do to change the future.

I am told you are trying to publisise your thoughts and story, mainly aimed towards secondary school pupils. As a secondary school pupil, I would love to help you there. I run a monthly newsletter that I send to a few secondary schools around my local area, and I beleive publishing some of your thoughts would get the message through to people. I could email you a copy too.

I understand that you are very busy at the moment replying to people and keeping in touch with friends and family, so I understand if you are unable to get back to me.

If we never speak to one another, I would like to send my best wishes and best of luck to you. Remain strong we are all thinking of you at this time.

Take Care,
Billy

Adrian,

Your bad days can only make room for good days.

I hate reading that you are feeling the unsettling affects of your illness. Especially after coming back from what must have been an incredible high of your campaign thus far.

May you regain better health and strength.

Agape,
Kimberly Parr
Cincinnati, Ohio
USA

Adrian,
You have fought the fight and you are one brave young man that has endured more than most will ever know. You are an inspiration and a champion for the cause. My heart goes out to you and your family. Thank you for sharing your life and the dedication to educate others how they can help in this fight. I pray for a cure.
May you have comfort.

Dianne
USA

Dearest Adrian,

After several failed attempts to post something to you, Liam has graciously agreed to give you a message for me. I know that you are receiving many posts, and spending your last precious days with family and friends, but I had to personally tell you how much you touched my heart. Thank you for allowing so many to know you through your blog. You're an amazing person, and if I can have just half of your courage and character, I will consider myself very lucky. Most people, myself included at times, go through this life so worried about the unimportant things, and yet you have shown me what is important. Family, friends and love. You talk about how blessed you are to have your family and friends, I think it is the other way around, everyone is blessed to have you! I will never forget you Adrian. May Heavens love protect and surround you.

Love in Spirit,

Shunda Carlisle
USA

Adrian,
Maybe someone screens your emails. Maybe you will never get this. Maybe you won't have time or strength to read this. But, I hope you do.

I don't know you, and you know me even less. I have read some of what you have had to say on here, and it makes me sad. I am saddened by the fact that you have to suffer. I am saddened because there are others like you suffering also. I am saddened that you are unable to enjoy life. But most of all, it makes me truly sad to see the complete and total lack of hope that you have. I would like to, in a moment, share with you how you can have hope.

Adrian, as I mentioned, I do not know you at all, but, apparently you are a very well liked, and even loved, person. People have written about how you are courageous and an encouragement to them. Well, I hope those things are all true. But I must be honest, I do not find your most recent comments of despair to be inspiring at all. I hope you will appreciate and respect my desire to be totally honest and forthright with you. I think if my days were very few (and who knows, perhaps they are), the last thing I would want would be a bunch of people being polite and falsely sweet in hopes of improving my mood. I would want people to be real. (Now, perhaps all of your posters are indeed sincere; I hope so).

So, I hope you appreciate the nature of my message. Namely, I hope to be blunt, sincere, real, loving, and most of all, I want to offer you hope.

All of us on this earth have our days numbered. You, unlike many, have a decently accurate idea of when the end will come. But, life ceases for all humans. Is that a reason to be sad or despair? Well, perhaps, if we don't know what life is for or what is next. But, Adrian, I am writing to tell you that we can know what is next.

As you may have guessed by now, I am certainly talking about the afterlife, and specifically the wonderful place called heaven that God has created. As your days are waning, I will not beat around the bush. I may sound preachy, for, after all, that is my intent. The good news, Adrian, and the hope that we can all have is that heaven is a completely free gift from God. As is the case with all gifts, it cannot be earned, deserved, or purchased, or else it would not be a gift, but an earned wage.

But, the problem that we all have, is that we are all imperfect sinners. We all, quite naturally, do things that are contrary to God's perfect law and plan. We all neglect to do the good that we should. And certainly we all think thats that are dishonorable. Therefore, the result is that the perfect and holy God who created us, cannot let us into His heaven. Only perfect people can dwell in a perfect place with a perfect God. You see, while it is true that God is good, and loving, and forgiving, He is also just. And like any just judge, He cannot leave the guilty unpunished. Our punishment is separation from Him in a suffering and miserable afterlife. This is bad news and a problem for us all.

So, how is our problem solved? It is solved for us by the person of Jesus Christ. He is God who came to earth as a person. And what He did was, he died and suffered in order to pay the penalty for our sins. You see, as I mentioned, God must punish our sins. But thankfully, Jesus Christ paid for them so that we wouldn't have to. It is like a judge serving a criminals jail time, or a father paying a son's debt. The difference is that our debt is infinite, and only the infinite God-man, Jesus, could pay for it.

So, now what? We know heaven is free. We know we are sinners separated from God. We know God is loving and forgiving, but also just. We know we deserve punishment. We know Jesus took the punishment for us, and purchased a place in heaven for us. So, now what? How do we get this gift that He bought?

The answer: by faith. We must believe that Jesus did what He said He did. We must believe that He is who He says He is. We must stop trusting in our own ability to do good things, and start trusting in what Jesus already did. Faith is not simply about health or money or temporal things. It is not simply believing in some facts about God. It is trusting in Christ alone for eternal life, and receiving Him and both Savior, and the Lord of your life.

If you believe these things, if you want the peace and hope that only God can bring, and if you want to know that the next life is better than this one, simply tell God that you believe. He knows your heart and its sincerity. I will pray for you. I strongly urge you to take a few moments to consider this. Your time on this earth may be nearing an end, but, what is next? If there is even a slight, slim chance that we enter eternity after we do, is it not worth considering where we will spend it?

Thanks for your time!
-josh durham

Dear Adrian

Please know I'd do anything to remove your pain.

You are uplifting, buddy

Unforgettable, too

That is SOOOOO good to see in this world

And the only thing worth seeing in this world!

I'd do anything to take away your or your familys pain

This is no easy world for any of us (thus: God?)

People like you are the only thing worthwhile in this world !!!!!

With you, with you, with you

and would do anything to make it better

consider not giving in - - ur only 27 and can beat lots of odds at your age

STAY STRONG!!!!!!!!

X!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Laura London

By the way, anyone can see that you are still totally a looker - - please, certainly never feel worthless in that particular department, ok ? : )

We understand.

You have showed us all what it is all about, already,(at only 27 ({!}), whatever!!! - - what more can aany man do dear one?

I have Yorkshire blood and I never would've heard Mary Jo's wonderful joke if not for here, now: ) . It is just right. : ) Everything is just right whatever. We get it. Sign me up foe every list!!!!!!!

I love it when someone knows whats what at 27 : ) ! Not everyone does

I think God and your parents are very, very proud of their masterpiece.

God must patent you !!!!!!

Your project must get sindicated!!!!!

Sign me up for every list!!!!

With you, and "getting" you and extremely grrateful to God : ) ! !

So I will pass this perfect story and this joke on to all my fellow descendant Yorkshire hearts(who are stuck in London - - and the USA - - )

It's such a small world now - -
Remember when you were born, and the world - - was all so big?

Now - - you have this whole little world at your feet : )

All the love in the world to all of you over there

Laura Parkinson

P S The world needs more great stories and more real perfection - - if we were all like you - - Well, what a wonderful world. Let's go with this hope : ) ! ! !

PSS sign me up for every list - - this whole thing has that "x" (Aiddy)factor all over it, and this perfect story all needs to get syndicated : ) !

!

!

sorry, was interrupted . . . So, God needs to patent the sort of spirit you have, okay? : ) !!!!

Hi Adrian,I saw you a few months (?) ago on the news (channel 5?) and at long last have got round to reading your blog.This is such an awful thing to be going through.  All the sympathy in the world doesn't make up for the fact that you are in horrendous pain, and feeling lousier than words can express.  I don't know how you are coping - I don't know how any of us cope.I am 38.  I have my two gorgeous girls, and a wonderful husband, but it doesn't make it any easier to cope in the face of an early death.  There is the pain of having them watch me when the pain is too much to bear, or when I'm throwing my guts up.  Chemo was hard, and radiotherapy was harder (but then you already know all this), not just on me, but on the family and friends who love and care about me.

You say you have weeks left - I hope you are wrong. Every cancer patient who dies reminds me of my own inoperable lung tumour, and the threat to my own life - this uncertain future, the pain and illness that sucks up so much precious time.

I have learned over the past 8 months to appreciate my life and what I have achieved, and I know you will have experienced the same, or similar. All I can do is wish you well, hope the pain subsides and the drugs don't give you awful side effects. Hang on in there - miracles do happen - I'm banking on it personally!

Your blog is wonderful. I think you've done wonders in raising awareness and understanding, and I hope all the lovely comments you've been getting are bringing you some comfort (and if not joy, then wonder at least) at this awful time.

Don't give up. Trite but true.

With much love,

Lisa

Hi Adrian,

I heard you on Radio Five Live speaking to Victoria a few months back. It was very moving and yesterday I gave blood for the first time and and asked to go on the bone marrow register.

You inspired me to go and do something good and i hope that i may be a match for someone.

Keep your spirits up and i hope to hear you again on Five Live

Justin

A gallon of the hottest water you can drink might keep you here and feeling better until they fix you.